I feel so fickle-minded.
Everytime i decided on something, i immediately regret it.
I wanted to continue, but i see no point in doing so.
I want to let you know, but you don't seem to care.
I want to support you in case you breakdown, but was not needed.
Everything i did was prioritized to help you, for you.
In the end, heh, i ended up not being grateful to. Not pleased, unsatisfied, unhappy with what i did.
I tried to take a step forward, but every action you did and words you said made me hesitate and step backwards again. What in the world do you really want me to do. Love you? Hate you? Do nothing about it? What exactly do you want.
This minute you told me not to give up. Next second you tell me those bullshit that i don't wish to listen. So what are you really telling me?
I told you i wanted to continue because i'm just afraid something might happen to you. But now i see, you don't need it i guess.
So...everything that we both did so far what bullshit?
What you told me was bullshit?
What you did was bullshit?
Until now, a few days after the incident i still don't get it.
I think you're still better off with him.
Why is it that what i received is worst than what he got? I don't understand.
And why do i even deserve this in the first place.
Yea, we got nothing to start off since the beginning. So?
I know you want to end this because you rather let me suffer now than next time right?
But do you really this idea is ideal?
I really gave my all towards you.
And the worst thing that could ever happen happened.
You might be thinking,
i'm sweet-talking, bullshitting now right?
Yea, i only know how to sweet-talk(:
Only know how to bullshit(:
Nothing i ever said so far was true(:
Cos no point believing in guys right?
We only know how to cheat, how to sweet-talk, how to bullshit in front of girls nia right?
I know you are angry looking at this.
But i don't feel good either.
I've no one else to approach and the only place to say all these is here.
Like what i said, you can choose to believe or not to what i said.
It's your own choice.
But right now, i can guarantee you, i won't lose to you regardless of how unhappy/sad you are now.
Maybe you are even enjoying, "Arh, finally this idiot is gone."
You won't and can never understand how i survived this hellish 2 days.
You can hate me, regard me as the most asshole guy ever. Or even the most petty guy ever cos i deserve it. I deserve this because i care too much, i gave in too much, or even love you too much.right?
How stupid can this guy get eih(:
I wanted to remain as normal but your actions and words just didn't show that we can. It's not that i didn't want it.
